Saturday, October 27, 2007

Relax:Yours Lovingly..CMMI

Note:Knowledge of CMMI Process areas could make this a interesting reading.let me know if any process areas of CMMI are missed out !!

Dear Charl…
It was three years ago..I still remember the day when we
first met in a Interview for a job , where you came in
drenched in rain.We started dating;
your Character Made Me Irresistible and I fel in love
with you. We soon became soulmates and started our lives.
We had agreed upon some common objectives and
goals and decided to align our personal
and professional lives towards them.Just to quote a few :
a home in year 2008 ,Spend Variance <10%, Home
availability rate of 80 % in weekends etc.. Unfortunately
over the past years, our Love and Life Database (L& L) has
been populated with bad experiences and sour memories.
Looking back at past data it reveals :Spend Variance : 35 %
( data from last 7 data points collected from past 7 months)
Home availability in weekends : 45 % ( in weekends)
Deeper analysis of all data and correlating them indicates there have
been both Chance and Assignable causes.
Looking at the Spend variance, the assignable causes have been:
increased spending in clothing ,partying, Smoking.Your Smoking
limit has crossed more than 2 % of Upper Specification Limit that
was decided in our Life -Ahead Capability Baseline (LCB) .
In fact in the new version which we baselined on last august I had
agreed for a increase from 1 % just not to disappoint you. The
tailoring guidelines clearly stated.’ drinking only in Social occasions’
but there has been lot of deviations to it. I prefer not to
quote the day when I caught you red handed in the pub
partying with couple of girls!!Nevertheless , all along I had
tried to understand your needs , aspirations
and gave all my care and affection.To make things work ,
I had planned up mini projects and tried to monitor and control
them to see some improvements.
I capture your needs and requirements come up with a
technical solution to bring you back to shape so that we
integrate our lives and carry on. But before I could test and validate
the effect of the solution your interests and mind
swings, which throws my project out of gear. It becomes difficult to
capture your ever changing requirements and reinitiate a project.
To quote a example, your cutting down on partying and replacing with
your new found interests on collecting old perfume bottles. Everyday
I had to clean and arrange that cupboard of 1345 bottles leaving me
with dizziness and loss of smell sensation .
Oof !!So , I guess its time for me to appraise strengths and weaknesses of a
life with you and take an decision to split.So let me know your comments
on this..


Dearest Linda…
I appreciate your initiatives and your pointing of my non
conformances. Though there has been lots of bad decisions
where I had gone about without a formal decision making
exercise, I am sure my decision to have a life with you
was well thought of .Doing a causal analysis, I could
understand the root causes of all issues.
Like it was calculated risk ,when I partied with two girls
on the pub when you spotted me.It had totally gone out of
mind that you had your office conference in the same hotel!!!
But it was just one such incident in every man’s life and
you couldn’t deny that now I hardly go out with any girls
and even give my Mobile for a audit every day to check
my SMS and Call history. That incident
has taught me to manage risks better !!Also your analysis
on spend variance crossing > 35 % has a flaw in it. If you
remember , in our Spend measurement guidelines ,
I had agreed upon to bear all your cosmetic spends in my
account because of the commitment I gave you
during our love making days that , ‘I would give all my
money to see your face glowing like this’. And you had used
that moment to seal a deal with me!!
Past in past and I don’t mind to do that but that spend
contributes to around 18 % of that 35 % spend variance !!!
If need be I can train you again on the
Measurement guidelines.Honey , after all life is not all about
money !!Leaving all that aside, I propose lets put up a
Life-Ahead Improvement Request’ and pilot few new
things to get along. I am sure at end of the piloting phase
we would have a redefined understanding to take us along
in the rest of our life .
If your not for it , I need to innovate and do a
Cost – Benefit analysis to find a new partner for me ,
which my heart would not allow at any point.With a
collection of Lessons Learnt , lets look forward to
fill the Love and Life Database with best practices
and evergreen memories.

Your everloving

Six months after pilot
Things worked for Charl and Linda and soon they were awaiting their new baby!!

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