Thursday, December 28, 2006

Relax !! - SQA Nursery ..

Software Quality Assurance Nursery School
( As a Software Quality Assurance person thinks about work life..)

Twinkle, twinkle little star
I just wonder what we are?

Said to be the Management’s eyes and ears
We don’t have value all these years!
I plan my work and go to PM
He just says come after 6 p.m
Quality work is pushed to last
As the PM feels without it nothing is lost!

Twinkle, twinkle little star
I just wonder what we are?

Just for boasting we got CMMI !!
But after that Who am I?
No body wants to listen to us
Are we here to make a fuss?
Metrics, Goals and Data sheet
Moment I ask these I am shown the street!

Twinkle, twinkle little star
I just wonder what we are.

I also think is quality a fad,
As with no work to do I go mad;
Whom to blame what to blame
But year on year many quality models came
As one more day comes to an end
I just wonder how much to bend

Twinkle, twinkle little star
I just wonder what we are?

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Friday, December 08, 2006

Relax !!!

Troubleshoot Heart @ Cupid Inc ..

Dear Ms.Software,

The moment you hit my heart screen , my system brokedown.
I tried to reboot my system ,but after troubleshooting
found that , it has been attacked completely by Love virus.
All these years the firewall I had in my heart against intrusion
of any girl , was hacked by your powerful sight and
now I am left with no anti –virus protection.
As data packets of love spreads across my entire network ,
it throws out the message ‘I Love You,I Love You’.
I hope you would press ‘Accept’ for this message and
make it compatible with my Operating System.
I am just sending this mail with the subject as ‘Service Request ‘
so that my request as a customer is fulfilled upon which I
will sign in a life agreement and handover the total maintenance
of my Operating system to you.
Please respond to the request with in 24 hours.
--Soft hearted Hardware..

Dear Mr.Hardware,
While debugging the code related to your service request ,
I had to put the issue under ‘Need Clarification’ as
I suspect it had been raised against a wrong person.
If it is the case,please close the issue and log out of this

Else proceed further ,
From the request I could judge that requirements
are not clear and your current application is throwing
junk values as thoughts , I suggest you migrate to
SOASelf lOve Assessment .
When you migrate to SOA , you will get the following results :
BASICally VISUAL Cing a person should not call
the love function.There is more to Cing.It is C+ ..+.. .
You have to validate what are those other + + things ,
before calling the love function to execute the loop.
Don’t get DOT Netted by this rejection as there are
lot of other girls you can find out from Open Source junctions
like JAVA Café , Sybase Disco or COGNOS d-mall.
I am sure you will find a good software to run your
Operating System.
So I am closing the service request and you will not be
allowed to ‘Reopen’ the issue. Thanks.
--Hardhearted Software
On reading the response ,
System Crashed. Not Responding !!!